Have you ever felt that little urge to punch something or someone then it grows to the feeling of ripping someones tongue out, bashing their head to the concrete wall til the powdered wall and blood mix together or just simply slicing every breathing human you ever see on your daily walks.
I feel those urges, almost every second in everyday. I just want to punch someone to the point my knuckles would bleed as well as the face of the victim. I want to purposely kick someone on the side walk to a moving vehicle. Or sometimes just hit the neighbor’s child that prefers to pee just right next to our small gate, i just want to hit her to death and when her mother comes i’ll feed her fresh meat forcefully to her. And if her grandfather gets mad, i’ll just say “I just simply removed your tiny problem, and i enjoyed in doing it so thank you for the opportunity” and smile and serve him the meat of his unwanted grand daughter.
I would rather point my rage to a human than to an animal, because they simple act by their instinct unlike us, humans, tends to do more and more of such shitty things. Someday, we’ll all stand up and kill each other. Someday, we will be the ones to burn every living tree and ;feed and waste on every plant crops that we will find and whine on how hungry we are til we kill each other for meat.
The cry of a baby that is not satisfied, how beautiful it is to my ear, how fun to hear and then i tend to imagine a scenery where the sky is red being covered by the large dark clouds. The image of people, lying on the ground, gasping for air and suffering from the excruciating pain. Some stab by the debris that fell on them and some burnt. Some may live, with scars on their bodies and inside their brain. Trauma that drives them to do more destruction or just simply run til they collapse. Run! run as far as you can, the flames may catch you and eat you once again.
When such things cross my mind, sometimes i just let them stay for a while and let them feed on the sad and dark thoughts. But sometimes i brush them off with a punch to the air or a wall.
It is just annoying how an individual have a community inside its head. We create such personas based from who we want to possibly be or from the people we met. Sometimes they are people that we don’t like but balancing the community is sometimes alright. Creating different thoughts, voices, weird ideas and just someone you could talk to. We create such societies inside of our head to satisfy ourselves since the society we live in is more likely bullshit. We live for money, so that when we have enough we’ll want more and more til we are drowning in it. Money gives us the purchasing ability to buy our needs and wants but we prefer to prioritize our wants more often. We buy expensive shoes that we will not use that much and just pile them up in a closet. Tons of perfume that tends to be irritating to the nose rather than pleasing. Money is the driving power in this world, if you don’t have money, you have no power.
And, this is all for the today. I lost my trails of thought and the result just scrambled up.