This is the first time that i feel sick just because of being stressed and i feel like i’m going to vomit. The source of my stress? My ex-girlfriend, she still texts me that she will go at my house especially during midnight, which fucking annoys me since the place is not very safe and i don’t her to be near me. That is the reason i threw away my old sim card, so that she will not be able to contact me. If you’ve read my past blog you will know the story. Anyways, i just don’t want her to be in danger, i’m still human so i still care but she ignores it especially when she is bloody drunk. I’m now pushing such kindness back since i can’t handle the stress and i really feel like puking. It is my fault but still there is a limit to it and it is now. I don’t want to be an ass and shout at her because i might really go to that point and it might be in public or i might face the worst, possibly hit her with something, continuously, til she lost consciousness or i lose it. I don’t want to reach that side of me, my stress is building up and it adds more that i might even harm her.
I’m really tired, really really tired. I just want to hug my angel and rest atleast on her knees to calm me.
I wish, that she will wake up and stop this acts and move on with her life.
I just wish, before i go dark.