Regret

Hi! i just want to share how I’m feeling right now and the stupid mistake I have done.

Last June 27, I broke up with my girlfriend of 34months (2 years and 10 months) because I don’t feel the same way anymore. They say it can still be fixed but all i can say is “How?”, if you read my  introduction to who i am you will know I’m not that type of person to give so much effort in doing different things. Although, in our first year i gave effort and time to her then in the coming months it gradually decreased. Maybe because I’m so comfortable with her that is why i did not want to give too much effort in our daily life as a couple. I did not cheat if that is what’s on your mind.Yes, i met new and different people and most of them are girls and i had some crush on those but that is not enough to push away the feelings since i know for a fact that she is the best i could have and i love her family as well and they  love me too. It’s only been 5 days since our break up and I’m already regretting the decision i made, all i can think about is I’m just afraid to try new things(obviously) and i already found a place to be safe and comfortable. I’m really scared right now I feel so lonely and I don’t know who to lean on, even though I’m used to being alone even when I’m with her but at least I know that if I poke her she will offer her shoulders to me.

I already thought of killing myself again but now my psychopathic side won’t kick in to stop and distract me. I lost, I loss a very good person to me and i regret it. I always play safe but now i walked right into the wrong path.

What to do?